Suggest to a Capricorn that the two of you go skinny-dipping in the public fountain - just for the heck of it. His ears will turn red. He will shudder. He will look at you like you've lost your marbles.
"That is illegal, immoral, and furthermore" (here he's got you) "it makes no sense," he'll say.
Everything Goats do is legal, moral, and makes sense. That's why they're so successful. They're shrewd, methodical, and driven - a corporate dream. Goats stick with tradition - what worked for their grandparents is just fine for them, thank you.
Goats plod with determination to the top. They don't make mistakes. They plan their lives carefully, from which suit they will wear on Tuesday to which money-market fund they will invest in. Goats always have savings to invest. They're thrifty (some call it cheap). They save the tin foil from carry-out food.
They only talk about important subjects, like the stock market. The get upset if you know something they don't about an important subject, like the stock market. They like to be recognized as the best at what they do - and they usually are.
Goats do learn to relax as they get older. Once they've accomplished all that they need to (a lot more than most), they start growing younger. They allow themselves to indulge in their natural love of nature, art, and music and nurture their own creativity. They let a little sentiment seep through their tough shells. They may even buy a puppy.
Somewhere under that chilly, reserved exterior, Goats have a heart. The have to. Everybody does.
It ain't easy to find. Goats are shy and cautious when it comes to love. All that gushy stuff gives them heartburn.
They can get sidetracked by surface virtues - like wealth, power or social status - and marry for all the wrong reasons. This can lead to a less-than-happy marriage. But once they've signed on, most Goats stay married. They stubbornly believe they can work anything out.
Goats tend to be loners. They're afraid to have friends, because they're afraid of being hurt. They carefully select a few intimate friends deserving of their undying loyalty.
Goats take friendship as seriously as they take everything else. They have sturdy shoulders, they keep promises, they're responsible and loyal. Don't cross them, or you're out of their life forever. You don't get a second chance.
Beware of Goats on their way to the top. They can be opportunists, using people in the name of friendship.
Capricorn and Taurus: Carefully planned destiny. Their solid love results in a church wedding, well-mannered children, and a fat pension fund. Dan Quayle, eat your heart out. We're talking family values here.
Capricorn and Gemini: The practical Goat will never, ever understand how the scattered Twins run their unplanned, unpredictable lives. The two can learn a lot from each other - but they might kill each other first.
Capricorn and Cancer: The super-achieving Goat provides all the security Crabs need - for a price. Capricorns may not have time to meet Cancer's heavy emotional needs. A solid union that requires effort.
Capricorn and Leo: Lions would delight in spending all that money practical Goats have saved up for a rainy day - but no Goat would let them near it. Leos don't believe in rainy days; Capricorns always carry an umbrella. Their differences are immense.
Capricorn and Virgo: A perfect union, based on mutual understanding and respect. These earthy souls will laugh, cry, and grow old together.
Capricorn and Libra: Capricorn sees the glass half-empty, Libra sees it half-full. The Goat steadily plods the path toward his goal; Libra studies, weighs and agonizes over which path to take. Usually, their paths run opposite directions (a blessing for both).
Capricorn and Scorpio: Scorpio will be pleased and puzzled that the unemotional Goat has little interest in his closely guarded secrets. They will be a "power couple," feeding off each other's drive and ambition. But they will never, ever completely understand each other.
Capricorn and Sagittarius: In this case, opposites don't attract - nor should they. The Goat should stay in the safety and comfort of home and wave good-bye to happy-go-lucky Sagittarius as he trots off to Timbuktu. Nothing's worth this kind of heartache.
Capricorn and Capricorn: They'll respect, honor and admire each other. Side by side, they'll build a solid life and substantial savings for a rainy day. Trouble is, they both think too much about that rainy day. This relationship can get gloomy.
Capricorn and Aquarius: It's not the worst combination under the sun - but it comes pretty close. Both sides will have to work very hard to overcome their completely different outlooks and attitudes. If they can do that, they'll learn a lot from each other.
Capricorn and Pisces: On the surface, their differences seem great, but they're softened through natural communication and mutual acceptance. They will spend many warm nights by the fire, away from the crowds, basking in the sympathetic vibrations of their union.